My first child, Thomas, was born this week, and man, what an experience! A dig in the ribs just before 4am was the rude awakening that something was happening, and by 10am he was here! Those 6 hours (which at times seemed like weeks, and at others seemed to fly by in seconds) included some of the most amazing emotions I've experience in my whole life. From the 'lows' of worry, distress and feeling helpless, as you see your partner in such pain, to the unrivalled 'high' of seeing the little fella take his first breath. A real roller-coater!But y'know I'll be honest... although desperate to become a father, in the lead up to the big event a few doubts started to creep in, and I started to worry about how our new addition would change my life. I'm sure everyone goes throught the same thing, but the nearer it got, the more i worried...
Loss of freedom: 35 years on from buying my first 'record', and more than 25 years on from my first gig, my enthusiasm for music (and in particular LIVE music) is as passionate as ever. How was having a child going to affect our lifestyle of giggin' and liggin'? After a lifetime of being able to drop everything and head off for a last minute show in London, how easy would it be to come to terms with the loss of this freedom? something that was always taken for granted in the past. We put a block on gigs from mid-October onwards, and it was incredible how the floodgate of 'quality gigs' seemed to immediately open from that point onwards! Even the Sex Pistols reformed for November, just to try and piss us off a bit more! The frustration of not being able to book up shows I wanted to go to was very odd and very real.
Lack of money: I've been worrying a lot about how we will manage, especially as my partner, Julie, will be taking un-paid leave for a while, followed by returning to work 'part-time' at best. Will we still manage? and will I still be able to keep up my 20+ a month habbit (CD's that is!)? I have untreated book and DVD addictions, and numerous comic subscriptions to support!
But the second the little chap arrived none of that seemed to matter any more. It's like my brain instantly re-prioritised my life.... Of course it will change your life, it's MEANT to change your life! It's no longer about me and Julie, it's about us as a family.
I'm looking forward to the future like never before - and i know without a doubt, whatever sacrifices I\we have to make, they will be re-payed ten-fold by the joy our new arrival is already bringing.
If you got this far, thanks for sticking with it! Normal service will now be resumed, and there are some exciting articles in the pipeline, an exclusive interview with up and coming indie band Silvery (see last weeks post to hear them), and some fantastic 'guest editor' slots on the way.
Piley
10 comments:
Congratulations to you on the birth of your glorious boy. He's a bonny looking fella. Everything from this point forwards will change. Just roll with it and vibe on it and it'll all be fine.
Well done to you all can't wait to nip over and see him -
Having a little'un or two - does make you a lot more selective about what bits and bobs you decide spend your earth pounds on. but its well worth it.
PS - I had Chinese curry for tea (from the good people at wah hing - Nelson Rd)and tuna bake for lunch ;)
I expect young Thomas to be into T-Rex, Sputnik and Bowie by the time he is 2 weeks old.
Love to all in Chez Piley
xx
Congrats to you all, give our love to Julie and young Tom.
I'm no expert but in my experience the things you were worried about take care of themselves. You will find the stuff you took for granted like gigs and CD purchases, feel all the more satisfactory when you do indulge !
There are some fantastic times ahead for you all, enjoy every day of it mate.
PS - Can't find a Sputnik sleepsuit for love nor money !
My friend......A few weeks ago I was lucky enough to pay off my mortgage - within a few days I became financially richer and for me a life changing moment.
You of course have had a very different life changing moment, and in the future you can share your love of music, football and all other varied interests with young Thomas. Thats what Dads do.
So, who is the richer? Rather obvious really.
So, when you stare into his eyes, you will see Thomas, and probably a reflection back of other key people from your life who are not there in body to share, but are there in your heart.
Many congratulations to you and Julie!....."Life is sweet".
hello piley. Dont ever worry about what you post about. that is the joy of having your own blog, there are no rules! as diverse as they have been, ive enjoyed all of your posts, if its written well, it doesnt really matter if its a subject i am interested in. for what its worth, i think the one about your son was possibly your best. for many reasons. congratulations and enjoy being a dad.
Oi Piley, dont think you have to apologise about saying how happy you are! You've just won the lottery bloke. There will still be plenty of time for doing some of the stuff you mentioned, except you'll want to do new stuff also. You'll complain about given every weekend up for his football practice, but you'll be luvin every minute of it. Anyway, no doubts the poor young fella will be taking his old man to a few dodgey Sputnik gigs in 2025 to keep you onside.
Congratulations on the birth of young T.J. The worry of all the things you might miss out on will soon be overtaken by all the things you've got to look forward to. The despair after sleepless nights and tantrums will disappear with one smile or word from him. I'm sure he'll have a great time growing up and you're probably already looking forward to taking him to his first gig. Just let me know when you want all them Quo cds copied for him. Probably one of the most touching posts and set of comments I've read. Best wishes to you all.
Congratulations on the birth of your son. He looks gorgeous!
Sorry, you have no idea who I am - I just popped over from the link on the long player blog and couldn't leave again without saying well done and all the best.
From my experience life becomes more intense - but only feels much better for it, and means more.
Ian TB
x
hey everyone - thanks very much for ALL of the comments.
Little TJ is doing just fine, although he still hasn't quite grasped the subtleties of Sgt Peppers... kids eh?
Seriously, I do really appreciate your kind words.
Piley
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